10 indignities of pregnancy

So I rarely do a rant piece ... and I have to admit this was inspired by a bit of TMI that I even hesitated as to whether I should post. Now here's my disclaimer - I'm not the least bit sorry that I'm pregnant. Despite all of the things I've had to endure - I wouldn't trade it for the world. I just think that when we talk about pregnancy - we never really talk about all the gross stuff we have to go through. So here's my post dedicated to the indignities of pregnancy :)

#1 - You will be poked with needles constantly

Yep - we get screened for everything. It sort of feels like every appointment related to my pregnancy involves me giving a blood sample for one reason or another. If you're squeamish over needles.. pregnancy will cure you of that.

#2 - Trying to pee in a cup just ain't that easy 

 I don't know about you - but I hate peeing in a cup. There's the whole balancing act of trying to catch a clean stream of urine into a cup. Then you have to make sure you seal it, don't spill any on the outside, and try to hand the nurse a cup of pee that doesn't look like it's been sprayed with pee!

#3 - Your significant other won't be the only person to stick a finger up there!

This one just sucks too - but if you've ever had your cervix checked.... you know the drill.  There's nothing like lying there as the obgyn rams two fingers into your nether regions, with a nurse making mindless conversation with you - and your significant other standing mortified in the corner. Oh the joys!

#5 - Your significant other won't be the only person to get a handful of your boobs

Yep - your obgyn will probably be giving you a breast exam before all is said and done!

#6 - Hemorrhoids

I'm sorry - but there's just something incredibly demoralizing and irritating about swollen bits of flesh on your back end that itch, ache if you sit on them, and make you not ever want to go #2!

#7  - Discharge

Your nether regions will simply produce lots of extra goo for the duration of your pregnancy. Say goodbye to having dry panties or say hello to 9 months of pads... whichever you prefer!

#8  - Bowing to the porcelain God

For whatever reason, somewhere along the way - your GI system will decide not to play nice. If it's not nausea, dry heaves, it's the runs or constipation. Either way - the bathroom will be your new local hangout!

#9 - Having random objects shoved up your nether regions

Be it speculums, transvaginal ultrasounds, or cervical checks... you will have things inserted in there. And you will get used to having lots of ultrasound gel / KY jelly type substances put in there.

#10 - Having to get injections in the butt

I haven't had so many shots in the butt since I was a kid. Should you find yourself getting progesterone shots or steroids, prepare to bend over and take a needle in the back side

This is all part of the pregnancy package :)