I'm so heartbroken over having gestational diabetes

I didn't think I'd be upset about this - but I do feel really down about this..... I mean.. I've worked out like a mad woman for years. Hell I used to run 20 + miles a week. I lost my first pregnancy with a 20 week spontaneous dilation. UGH! I had 5 years of BFNs after that. I went through 4 months of explosive diarrhea while adjusting my body to metformin. I went through 3 months on nutrisystem to get down to an ideal weight for IVF. I went through a bout of OHSS, I spent 3 weeks where I was in excruciating pain from PIO shots - only to find out I wasn't pregnant. I went through a cerclage and my cervix still shortened! I've been on bed rest for 8 straight weeks. I have 7 more to go! Now I'm pregnant and for a moment I got excited because I've gained only 9 lb in 7 months. I thought that maybe... just maybe I'd be able to win one little battle - but NO - now I have GD too. I honestly feel mentally battered. I wake up 4 - 5 times a night. I toss endlessly. I'm just tired and sadly am secretly wishing for a break from my pregnancy. I'd love to have just 2 days where I feel normal. It's such a weight to deal with. It's like this unending monkey on my back situation that I just can't get an escape from. I find myself fantasizing about having a tiny escape from this whole fertility battle. I know I have only 6 weeks until my cerclage comes out. We're so close to meeting our baby - but wow.... I'm going to have to pull myself together to get through this. OK .... rant over