I tried convincing myself that my BFP wasn't real! Maybe the test malfunctioned ? Maybe I just imagined it? So yes I ran out and bought another test - and there I was haunted by the super dark line!!!! There's no denying there is SOMETHING in the oven. I want to be excited but the infertile in me is looking for confirmation that the pregnancy is viable before I can accept it's existence. Right now my paranoia has leaned towards a possible blighted ovum. I mean I have PCOS , one ovary , and my one ovary had a wedge resection! I shouldn't be able to conceive on my own!!! I have no reason to suspect one - but yet it doesn't seem possible that I could conceive properly on my own. So here I am - going nuts waiting for Monday when I can get real answers from a new OB. Then once I have an answer - I can address a whole longer list of things - like where are we having this baby!!
Friday, January 24, 2014
Yes my delusion is absolute
I tried convincing myself that my BFP wasn't real! Maybe the test malfunctioned ? Maybe I just imagined it? So yes I ran out and bought another test - and there I was haunted by the super dark line!!!! There's no denying there is SOMETHING in the oven. I want to be excited but the infertile in me is looking for confirmation that the pregnancy is viable before I can accept it's existence. Right now my paranoia has leaned towards a possible blighted ovum. I mean I have PCOS , one ovary , and my one ovary had a wedge resection! I shouldn't be able to conceive on my own!!! I have no reason to suspect one - but yet it doesn't seem possible that I could conceive properly on my own. So here I am - going nuts waiting for Monday when I can get real answers from a new OB. Then once I have an answer - I can address a whole longer list of things - like where are we having this baby!!
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