Day 4 of the 10 day 2WW wait after my first IVF and ET

Ok - so this totally sucks. I've never been one to be obsessive about every possible symptom - but it's hard for your mind not to wander. I keep telling myself - even if I see something promising, I can't take it as definitive - so there's no reason to pay attention. So far I've had a bad dizzy spell 1 day after my transfer. I've also had some fluttering down there that has gone on for about a full day. I'd sort of call it really mild cramps!

I'm freaked out about sleeping on my stomach, but my bum is still sore from the PIO shots. Shamefully I've started taking my temperature, but this is useless since I didn't track my temperature through the full cycle.

7 more days until I test - I'm not going to do a self test. I don't want any of the agony associated with falsely positive or falsely negative tests.

Ugh!

An Ode to Metformin

Oh dear sweet metformin, bane of my existence
They say you’re here to treat my insulin resistance
You take the joy out of everything I eat
Restricting me to just veggies and meats
Goodbye all sweets, cakes, breads and fried treats
Whenever I eat you – I kneel to the toilet seat
But that’s not enough – you have to play tricks
Even when I behave I’ll still randomly get sick
Little white pills that pack such a punch
So tiny yet you can easily destroy my lunch
Pizza…pie…cookies… all things of the past
I have to behave or my tummy won’t last
And when I have to go – I have to go now
No matter where, No matter when, and No matter how
You’ve taught me that YES I can use public bathrooms
And that dignity is meaningless when your runny tummy looms
I love you and hate you all at the same time
But I take you daily until a new baby is mine

Just a little metformin rant........

Surviving my PIO shots

These progesterone in oil shots have been nothing short of a nightmare! I survived the daily injections, endless pills, painful vaginal ultrasounds ( looking for an ovary that hides under my intestine), and a bout of OHSS! I even have a slightly tilted cervix - so that made my ET incredibly painful. No wonder they were holding my hands down! But..... none of that even scratches the surface of the pain associated with my PIO shots. What sucks the most is that the injection doesn't hurt. Therefore you have no idea that you've done it wrong until you wake up in the morning. I used a heating pad for about 48 hours just to take the edge off the pain. I did learn later that sciatic nerve pain can be alleviated with heat ( for me ) but the ache from the shots can't

It has felt like a crap shoot this week - I just don't know if we did it right - and I have to wait until morning to find out. For the first two days we were on top of the butt cheek and hit my sciatic nerve twice. That completely crippled me. Fortunately it happened as my OHSS was starting to slow down - so I wasn't suffering from too much abdominal pain. And for those of you have never felt this - it's a SEARING burning pain when any pressure is applied to the buttock. It happens if you inject too close to the middle of your butt. DH and I have been trying different techniques - and this is what we're doing at the moment :

1. Take the shot standing up - leaning on the leg we're not injecting
2. Warming the needle in DH's hand for 5 minutes
3. 2 minutes of pressure with a gauze
4. 5 minutes of massage with a hot towel
5. 10 more minutes of massage until he feels like the collection of oil is gone
6. 10 minutes with a heating pad over the injection site

For now I can sleep on my side / stomach - with a pillow to raise any pressure off my belly. However, I don't know how I"m going to sleep if I'm really preggers.... It hurts to lean on one side!

I refuse to give up on these shots - but this has been a rough ride!

Day 1 of my 2WW err 10 day wait.....

OK first of all - my 2WW is really a 10 day wait. But hey - I'm happy for the 4 less days. I'm still struggling with the PIO shots - so I can't really move around much. I think waiting to see if this worked for 2 weeks is one thing - but being in excruciating pain in your butt cheeks while waiting is just darn right wrong!

I know my mind is going to play tricks on me. So far I have only had one of those - hmm.... wonder if that's because of implantation thoughts. I did my ET yesterday. I got a nasty headache that lasted about 45 minutes. I took my PIO shot - and woke up in horrible pain this morning. I didn't feel so hot, but I decided to take a hot shower. Those have really been helping. Talk about a total FAIL. I got a crazy dizzy spell as I was walking into the shower and DH had to catch me and help me hobble back into bed. I also had some weird hissing in my ears for 20 minutes. I decided screw working from home today - I need sleep....

I've been dozing on and off for the last 5 hours and plan to be in this bed for the rest of the day. So of course you know I'm asking myself ... I wonder what that headache was all about.......... what about the dizziness? Dizziness is how I found out I was preggers to begin with last time. But....who knows.... it's too early... still 9 days to go with my wait!! Ugh!

So i'm trapped in bed with my laptop, my thoughts, and hopefully a blastocyst that decided to camp out inside of me for 9 months. You gotta love it!

Waiting for my blastocysts

Now that I've survived by IVF and ER, I'm eager to see if my 6 embryos are going to yield 6 blastocysts. My insides still ache - I'm still scared that the embryos won't reach the blastocyst phase. I'm scared that we'll do 1 ET and I'll get a BFN. I'm scared I'll develop moderate to high OHSS . I'm scared my OHSS won't allow me to do my ET this month. Sigh - so many things to be afraid of.

My FIrst Injection

I've never given myself an injection before. Last night I gave myself my first shot with the gonal F pen. After watching the educational videos 4 times over - I did it. I could barely feel the prick from the needle. Of course now I have a little anxiety thinking this was too easy - so I had fears that the medicine didn't go in ... but it clicked enough times - I think!

I haven't felt any real side effects but I could feel the medication kind of spreading out . Not a pain or anything - just a subtle sensation that eventually dissipated.

So Total Fail

So I didn't post for like 2 years!!! Somehow I forgot the blogs were here. After 2 unsuccessful years on glucophage I'm trying nutrisystem diabetic. I don't know if it's any good - but I'll try to log some things around it.

Let's see - what else has happened....

I started playing soccer - needless to say I got injured after my very first game! But that's ok - I'm basically going to let my knee heal and I'm heading back out there. I'm pretty much playing with all guys - so it's a blast.